Of course I want her to keep telling me things. In fact, I NEED that. I’ll be worse than this if she stops trusting me. But I have to find a way to deal with it. Because at the moment, it’s slowly slowly killing me.
And it hurts that I can’t help her. It hurts me every single time that I think about it. But I’m powerless, and once more I’m feeling lost and very much alone in the big wide world.
For now, I know that I need to put on a brave face and answer the respiration questions. But I need someone to light up the path and show me the way. There has to be a way out. Right now, it feels like I’m being stabbed. The pain is completely uncontrollable, and I’m not sure that I can hide it for much longer.
Living. Laughing. Loving.