The Waiting Game

By some kind of miracle, I got out of my workshop thirty minutes early, which as given me a whole fifty minutes before concert band, which is amazing compared to the fifteen minutes that I was expecting.

I’ve tried my best to stomach the food that I can whilst being in this much pain, and whilst I know I physically shouldn’t go to band, I know that it’ll be good for me mentally.

I’m obsessively checking snapchat. I’ve not carried my phone around today, and I’m half waiting for that text from my best friend to say ‘hey, I dissected an X today’ or something silly along those lines. I think the only reason I’m still alive right now is a combination of the letter I got from her today, and the fact I know she hasn’t looked at her snapchat all day so she’s not ignoring me.

You see, tough love started today. I tried to get her to agree to one VERY CASUAL text message a day, because I really don’t like not hearing from her. She never technically agreed to this, but I don’t doubt that I’ll be disappointed if she checks snapchat and doesn’t reply. It’s silly. Oh, I know it’s silly. What you don’t understand however, is that I rely on this girl. Especially of recent weeks, she’s been amazing, and to suddenly go to no contact is going to be hard. I’m actually really rather happy today, but every day won’t be happy. Today, I can cope, but by Saturday, things might be different. Soon, I won’t be contacting her every single day. Neither of us have time for that. Now though, that one minute of contact will keep me going. I might not get it though, and I guess I’ve got to accept that, but that’s hard, too.

I’m rambling again. My brain is so scrambled as of recent, it’s rather odd.

Hopefully the snap or the text will be here when I’m back from band, and until then, I better raise my head high, ignore the pain, and smash that two hour reheashal.

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